Hello and welcome to OURSTORY, a platform accessible for all to present individuals stories right in front of your very eyes. My mission is to have as many voices heard as possible so that we can all be brought together as one community and to hopefully expose that we are all not that different.
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Join me today with Archie, a sedulous photographer and high school graduate, who has fiercely fought with death itself over the past 7 years..
Lost and Found:
Archie is a British, 16 year old who was raised in a Christian household and has always believed in faith, ever since he was a young boy. This striking ride with faith, however, was going to reach a sudden stop sign when he reached the age of 9:
"Seven years ago, my mum passed away from cancer. This was a huge stop sign in my life, but nothing else stopped, so I had to carry on differently. Suddenly having to grow up with things like walking myself to school, making my own food (and other things) was very confusing, especially at my age. It lead me to blame God and being angry. I continued to go to church because my family did...but I no longer could connect with him."
It was a struggle for Archie; one that I can't formulate into words to describe the experience. The motherly figure that would physically comfort him vanished into thin air; it would take him a number of years to escape the comfortable skepticism that ruled over his life during his dark ages:
"About 2 years later I think I started to understand it more and I felt that I could trust God again because, believe it or not, there was good that came from it. Yes, I lost a lot of friends and hobbies from the lack of time or struggling to enjoy what my friends did, but I did meet new people and discovered new things."
"Whilst trying new things and finding new friends, I started to have a number of injuries that seemed to stop me, but I wouldn't let it through. They gradually became much heavier and it was harder to find the motivation to have 'I can trust God in this' attitude; especially when I suffered a week of complete memory loss."
"After talking with some incredible people and praying every night I finally found my feet again, even when the hold-ups kept coming. Around the age of 11/12, I felt at my best and finally felt I could move forward without death being a rope pulling me back."
Sadly, so he thought:
"In February 2019, I had two potentially life-threating accidents. One was a bike accident, the other was falling down the stairs-the stairs were very scary. The doctors thought it was likely that I broke my spine and consequently thought that it was gonna change my life forever. Luckily, after a couple of tests, a miracle happened-I had come out of it injury-free and only had some internal bruising."
Many people might retort, "Man up"; one of the many demonstrations of the battles men have to face against the ignorant, masculine expectations set up by society. For Archie, he found that the devil was still tugging at the end of the rope which entangled him, playing with his mental health:
"But whilst I came out of it with no physical damage, I found that I was very mentally damaged. The first three weeks after, I couldn't leave the house without freaking out, thinking that something was going to happen and I wouldn't be so lucky. I was scared to leave the room and see people."
"I felt vulnerable but on a new level, one that I've never experienced before. It was so hard to explain to others what was happening because I didn't fully understand it myself. I was done with God; I couldn't trust and understand him anymore."
Despite being lost in uncertainty, betrayal, and heartbreak, Archie discovered that things slowly improved. He felt comfortable facing the world, accepting the days where he wouldn't leave the house and experimenting in new activities. He remembers one moment in particular, which he keeps close to his heart currently:
"I pulled myself together to help with the 'Leadership' conference at St. Peters. During one of the talks, where the speaker said that 'the bravest thing to do is ask for help'. I burst into tears, praying to God for the first time for ages to help me."
There are still many questions Archie has which he doesn't understand, but he knows, with confidence, that God is here and most of all:
"I can trust him again. I'd say the biggest lesson I've learned from these experiences is that I could have so much anger and confusion, where I'd feel like none would understand or would listen, but I know that God is listening. He teaches us through the times of hardship that we can always trust him, no matter what."
Lost and Found:
Archie is a British, 16 year old who was raised in a Christian household and has always believed in faith, ever since he was a young boy. This striking ride with faith, however, was going to reach a sudden stop sign when he reached the age of 9:
"Seven years ago, my mum passed away from cancer. This was a huge stop sign in my life, but nothing else stopped, so I had to carry on differently. Suddenly having to grow up with things like walking myself to school, making my own food (and other things) was very confusing, especially at my age. It lead me to blame God and being angry. I continued to go to church because my family did...but I no longer could connect with him."
It was a struggle for Archie; one that I can't formulate into words to describe the experience. The motherly figure that would physically comfort him vanished into thin air; it would take him a number of years to escape the comfortable skepticism that ruled over his life during his dark ages:
"About 2 years later I think I started to understand it more and I felt that I could trust God again because, believe it or not, there was good that came from it. Yes, I lost a lot of friends and hobbies from the lack of time or struggling to enjoy what my friends did, but I did meet new people and discovered new things."
"Whilst trying new things and finding new friends, I started to have a number of injuries that seemed to stop me, but I wouldn't let it through. They gradually became much heavier and it was harder to find the motivation to have 'I can trust God in this' attitude; especially when I suffered a week of complete memory loss."
"After talking with some incredible people and praying every night I finally found my feet again, even when the hold-ups kept coming. Around the age of 11/12, I felt at my best and finally felt I could move forward without death being a rope pulling me back."
Sadly, so he thought:
"In February 2019, I had two potentially life-threating accidents. One was a bike accident, the other was falling down the stairs-the stairs were very scary. The doctors thought it was likely that I broke my spine and consequently thought that it was gonna change my life forever. Luckily, after a couple of tests, a miracle happened-I had come out of it injury-free and only had some internal bruising."
Many people might retort, "Man up"; one of the many demonstrations of the battles men have to face against the ignorant, masculine expectations set up by society. For Archie, he found that the devil was still tugging at the end of the rope which entangled him, playing with his mental health:
"But whilst I came out of it with no physical damage, I found that I was very mentally damaged. The first three weeks after, I couldn't leave the house without freaking out, thinking that something was going to happen and I wouldn't be so lucky. I was scared to leave the room and see people."
"I felt vulnerable but on a new level, one that I've never experienced before. It was so hard to explain to others what was happening because I didn't fully understand it myself. I was done with God; I couldn't trust and understand him anymore."
Despite being lost in uncertainty, betrayal, and heartbreak, Archie discovered that things slowly improved. He felt comfortable facing the world, accepting the days where he wouldn't leave the house and experimenting in new activities. He remembers one moment in particular, which he keeps close to his heart currently:
"I pulled myself together to help with the 'Leadership' conference at St. Peters. During one of the talks, where the speaker said that 'the bravest thing to do is ask for help'. I burst into tears, praying to God for the first time for ages to help me."
There are still many questions Archie has which he doesn't understand, but he knows, with confidence, that God is here and most of all:
"I can trust him again. I'd say the biggest lesson I've learned from these experiences is that I could have so much anger and confusion, where I'd feel like none would understand or would listen, but I know that God is listening. He teaches us through the times of hardship that we can always trust him, no matter what."
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Wow! Such a brave soul to share the vulnerabilities and uncertainty that life sometimes walks with you on your journey navigating and questioning people, events, yourself and GOD?!.....like the writer rightly wrote.....the comfortable scepticism. I loved that! Sometimes it seems easier just to believe that this world is all bad, having the validation of just giving up, not opening up and being open to disappointment.
ReplyDeleteOnly thing is the world carries on regardless and you feel disconnected but then only you feel this truth in your world. What you give out, ultimately you also internally experience!
So, give heart, love, optimisum BUT hold a little back of you, just for you! You too will benefit from the good vibes.
Keep asking Archie and help will come. Maybe not always in quite the way you imagined. Everyone who loves you are always around you and in your heart. The unfolding picture is revealed bit by bit and as we reconnect to as much in the universe as we can, it becomes clearer as we close the gap in the reason for our unique existence. Much love and good luck in YOUR journey 😊